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What to do when no amount of tuition works?

What to do now

You may be asking yourself what in the world you should do now that you’ve already engaged several different tutors, each with different tutoring methods, but your child’s still not producing acceptable results at school. Should you explore more significant behavorial guidance such as from a counselor or a psychiatrist? What’s a parent to do at this point?

If you’ve explore a multitude of different tutors and different tutoring methods

What to do when no amount of tuition works?

What to do when no amount of tuition works?

or styles, then it may indeed be time to explore other options. Let’s first assess that you’ve exhausted all tutoring options available. Have all of your efforts been with an in-home tutor that comes to your own home and attempts to tutor your child? Or have you explored a tuition center or even a home-based tutor that provides tuition assistance in their home, instead of in yours? The reason why this may make a difference is that if your child is suffering from a behavorial issue, it could be one of them trying to get your attention. Therefore if you remove them from the home and leave them in the hands of caring and qualified tuition providers outside of your own home, you might see different results.

However, if you have tried all three fundamentally recognized methods of tutoring: tuition center, tutor’s home, or in-home based; and still see no results, then it is likely time to investigate if there is a deeper issue at hand. One that might require the help and guidance of someone experienced in identifying and resolving child behavior issues.

Children act out for a variety of reasons. As parents, we expect this. Even more distressing though is when your student is doing poorly in school in spite of your best efforts to provide them with every opportunity to succeed. Sometimes it is just more complicated than just a matter of them needing more one on one devoted time with an instructor to help them suddenly grasp the concept. Sometimes it is more than a case of the teacher or instructor doesn’t present the materials in a way that your child can readily absorb and comprehend. Yes, indeed, sometimes it is simply a matter of your child needing professional guidance from a trusted advisor who can help you and your child get to the bottom of why they aren’t performing well in school.

Professional help

If you are at this point, understand that it is normal to feel frustrated. After all, you are only human. But recognizing that your child needs professional help is the best thing you can do for them at this moment. The next hurdle will be to decide who to engage for this assistance and how to best assess this.

For starters, ask friends, family, teachers, or other professionals involved in helping children become successful for their advice and suggestions. A recommended professional is your best ally. If you don’t have any recommendation, then call a few offices of counselors and psychiatrists in your area. Ask if they treat children exclusively. You’ll want an expert who specializes in the unique and fragile psyche of children. Next ask them if they offer a pre-consultative visit where you can sit down with the therapist who would be assigned to your child. This will help you determine if you feel comfortable with them. Can you open up to them? Do they really take the time to listen to you? Do you feel like they will be an ally for you in your effort to provide guidance and assistance with your child’s issues? Be aware that unless your child is threatening to harm themselves or others, the counselor will not share specifically what is discussed with you once they start having sessions with your child. Therefore, it is imperative that you feel comfortable trusting your child to this individually without hesitation. Ask the counselor or psychiatrist if they will schedule periodic review sessions where you can come with your child so that there is an opportunity to discuss any issues together in a safe zone.

Once you’ve decided on a professional, you’ll need to explain to your child who you are taking them to see, what they should expect, and most importantly that they are to tell you if there are any issues between them and this new adult you’ve added to their life. The counselor should also recommend a first visit that is a joint session so that they can outline what to expect, and any ground rules, in front of both of you so that your child knows that you’ve been told the same thing by the counselor as they have been told. This builds trust in both the process and in the professional.

Your counselor should be able to advise you if your child needs someone with a higher degree, i.e., a psychiatrist, engaged in their treatment plan. And should the counselor or psychiatrist recommend any medications to treat any diagnosis, be sure that all records of medications prescribed are sent to your child’s primary care physician as well. Traversing the road of counseling is challenging, but should be very rewarding in the long run.

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